Self-Talk In The Third
Self-talk in the third person voice refers to the practice of speaking to oneself using one’s own name or pronouns instead of using “I” or “me.”
In some cultures around the world, warriors are recognized for expressing self-confidence by speaking about themselves in the third person in a positive manner, often including a blend of self-praise that borders on boasting. While we may not be warriors, life presents its challenges, and we must rally ourselves and forge ahead. We must embody the inner voice that encourages us to be resilient, maintain our focus, and persevere.
This technique has been found to have several benefits and can be a powerful tool for shaping our inner world. Here’s why:
1. Enhanced Self-Reflection: When we use the third person voice in self-talk, it creates a psychological distance between ourselves and the situation or problem we are facing. This distance allows us to gain a more objective perspective and engage in self-reflection. By speaking to ourselves as if we are an outside observer, we can better analyze our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, leading to deeper insights and self-awareness.
2. Emotional Regulation: Using the third person voice in self-talk can help regulate our emotions. Research has shown that talking to ourselves in the third person activates brain regions associated with self-control and emotional regulation. By addressing ourselves by name or pronouns, we can create a sense of detachment from intense emotions, allowing us to approach them with more clarity and objectivity.
3. Improved Problem-Solving: Speaking to ourselves in the third person voice can enhance our problem-solving abilities. By externalizing our thoughts and considering them from a third-person perspective, we can approach challenges with a more rational and logical mindset. This can help us generate alternative solutions, consider different perspectives, and make better decisions.
4. Increased Self-Compassion: Using the third person voice in self-talk can foster self-compassion and self-kindness. When we address ourselves with empathy and understanding, it creates a sense of distance from self-criticism and negative self-judgment. By speaking to ourselves as if we are a supportive friend or mentor, we can offer ourselves words of encouragement and reassurance, promoting a more positive and compassionate inner dialogue.
5. Enhanced Self-Confidence: Talking to ourselves in the third person voice can boost self-confidence and self-belief. Research has shown that using our own name or pronouns in self-talk can activate brain regions associated with self-identity and self-affirmation. By addressing ourselves in this way, we can reinforce positive beliefs about ourselves, build self-confidence, and cultivate a stronger sense of self.
6. Improved Performance: The use of the third person voice in self-talk has been found to enhance performance in various domains. By speaking to ourselves in a self-encouraging and self-motivating manner, we can boost our self-efficacy and belief in our abilities. This can lead to improved focus, concentration, and performance in tasks and activities.
In summary, self-talk in the third person voice can be a powerful tool for shaping our inner world. It enhances self-reflection, emotional regulation, problem-solving, self-compassion, self-confidence, and performance. By addressing ourselves as an outside observer, we can gain perspective, regulate our emotions, and cultivate a more positive and empowering inner dialogue. Be deliberate and also mindful of how you talk about yourself in your internal dialogues.

Great insights! Talking to oneself in the third person really helps gain perspective and boost confidence. Love these practical tips!
This is very true! Thank you 😊
I started utilizing this technique recently when I was encountering some issues and it definitely helps. Great write up!
I learned this technique when I realized that berating myself after a mistake led to a few minutes of mental self-abandonment that came with consequences. Thank you for your kind words.
I’d heard of it before but had not utilized it until recently when it was suggested to me by a counselor. I’ve carried my mistakes around far too long as well.
My pleasure and I hope you’re having a great day! Thank you for the great posts.